While having the honor of hearing these personal stories, i've also been able to share bits of mine. I noticed i usually start sharing once i get the idea that the person see's me as "holy" or a "saint."
A lot of time, i've been called so "pure" and "innocent" -- At first i laugh it off because it's hilarious and totally false. But i found myself feeling sad afterwards. Not because i felt judged but because most of the time, i think they just might think i'm "better" than them.
If you've been reading my blogs/talking to me...i've been wrecked by God in the fact that i need to come back to earth, get off my mighty horse, and realize that we're all God's children (full of sin). Don't get me wrong - i wasn't super self-righteous or anything.. But i found my sub-conscious judging indirectly at people that didn't dress like me, acted like me, looked "normal", etc.
So when i realized that there is even a slight possibility that they may have felt like i was better than them, it broke my heart. At that moment, i just wanted to rewind to the second they told me i'm "pure" a "saint" etc - and just tell them that i'm not better than they are. I am in absolute brokenness in God's eyes. Whether you compare me to the greatest pastor or a heroin addict on the streets - God see's me just as He sees you..as His daughter...same ole broken soul. Needing love, grace, and His mercy.
We are all broken & damaged goods. We tend to forget that when we're on a spiritual high or when we're on a complete spiritual dry season...and we compare ourselves to those who are just so good in their walk or judge those who aren't so good.
So for those who might think that they're not on the same level as some people that are really awesome in their walks with God and just so "holy" -- as great as they are, we all go through the same struggles and pains. We all have our own brokenness and baggage. But note this: God loves us, no matter what. He doesn't say come perfect! (i know i've mentioned this in another post) He says come now. With nothing - because really..what can we possibly give to God, that'll be of any use? Just ourselves ! A pastor head of thousands of people and a person that parties every weekend/maybeeveneveryday.. LOL can come to God and still have nothing to offer, but themselves and their love to just serve our amazing gracious God.
"Come to me, all who are weary and burdened,
and I will give you rest." Matthew 11: 28
Its seriously so simple! I mean, granted depending on how you feel about our Heavenly Father right now, i don't blame you if you don't see what i'm sayin' ...but whenever you're ready, i promise you...He'll do great things in your life. Because the thing is, He already is! You may not notice, but He's slowly molding you, even when you're far from Him. whyyyy?! Because He loves us. Just as we are.
So..i don't really know where i'm going with this anymore but...i'm really not a "saint" or "innocent" or "pure." (lol) - i am just as you are. living in sin, taking it day by day.
& most importantly, we are all equally loved by the amazing God upstairs~ so whenever you're ready to just say hi to Him in prayer or even just talk to Him real casuallyyy..do it!
Also, i'd love to even chat and hear your baggage! I have a lot of baggage to share as well to make you feel better..LOL :) And prayer requests will always be taken~ so please don't ever hesitate!
SIDENOTE: http://www.iftimestoodstill.org/ -- Awesome site made by the talent Kelly GH Kim. Click it, explore it, and tell us...#IfTimeStoodStill, what would ya do?
Do Everything In Love, Always~
SK
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